Okay now this is wild!!! I always keep a dictionary on my desk for reference. It's quite helpful because I'm always writing and blogging in my spare time. Anyhow, just now I accidentally knocked it off my desk and it fell to the floor. When I bent down to pick it up, my dictionary was opened and my eyes caught the WORD 'respect'. I read the definition and said YES You're right God, RESPECT is sorely lacking amongst humanity.
I was going to give you the simple definition from my dictionary only. But something just caused me to do a search which led me to the wikipedia definition. Kind of like an inner tugging. As I was reading I was not feeling a connection. I scrolled down to the bottom of the page and was led to this website titled appropriately 'RESPECT' and bingo wallah I felt the connection. I am deeply moved right now reading the description below. This is some pretty powerful stuff! This simple ACT could change so many things in our immediate environment and the rest of the world. How do you treat everyone around you?
I heard this story told by Joel Osteen. This story stayed with me. A mother and daughter were walking into a department store and the mother told the daughter, "Did you see the dirty look that saleswoman gave to me?" The daughter replied, "No mom she didn't GIVE you a dirty look, you were already wearing it when you came in."
When we show our respect for other living things, they respond with respect for us. ~ Arapaho Proverb
Respect means a lot of different things. On a practical level it seems to include taking someone's feelings, needs, thoughts, ideas, wishes and preferences into consideration. We might also say it means taking all of these seriously and giving them worth and value. In fact, giving someone respect seems similar to valuing them and their thoughts, feelings, etc. It also seems to include acknowledging them, listening to them, being truthful with them, and accepting their individuality and idiosyncrasies.
Respect can be shown through behavior and it can also be felt. We can act in ways which are considered respectful, yet we can also feel respect for someone and feel respected by someone. Because it is possible to act in ways that do not reflect how we really feel, the feeling of respect is more important than the behavior without the feeling. When the feeling is there, the behavior will naturally follow.
Going back in time, respect played an important role in survival. If we think of a small tribe wandering in the desert we can imagine that a person not respected by anyone could be left behind and die. Such a person was considered to have no worth, no importance, no value to the group. This, I believe is the foundation of our psychological need to feel respected.
Nowadays it seems much more possible to survive without being respected. Someone could, for example, inherit a large sum of money, have many servants and employees and have salesmen constantly calling on him and catering to him, yet not be respected in the least. Someone could also make a lot of money through having a particular talent which is valued, such as being able to dunk a basketball yet not really be respected, perhaps because of the way he treats others.
Still, there is a value to respect which money can't buy. Though someone's life might not depend on it, there are times, many times in fact, when another person has the chance to make a personal decision - a judgment call. When that person feels sincere respect for someone else, they will make a different decision than if they feel no respect, even if they have customarily shown a false, pseudo-respect to the person.
We can all sense whether we are respected or not. This holds true for those with money and power as well. Moreover, it is quite possible that those who pursue money and power are actually trying to gain a type of respect that they never have truly felt.
When we are respected we gain the voluntary cooperation of people. We don't have to use as much of our energy and resources trying to get our needs met. When people respect one another there are fewer conflicts. In summary, it is for both evolutionary and practical reasons that respect is important, and also why we simply feel better when we are respected.
No comments:
Post a Comment